I can’t wait for football season to start. With the addition of Payton Manning, Ty Warren returning to good health, and Von Miller taking even more strides in his second year in the pros, maybe there will actually be some good news in the Denver Metro area. But until then, we have this. And as if that wasn’t bad enough, we get to be labeled with this.
See, Jack Phillips is an asshole. As the owner of Masterpiece Cake Shop, he has decided that it’s his right to determine which wedding receptions should have cake or not, based solely on whose nuptials are being celebrated. Why? Because he’s “a follower of Jesus Christ, so you could say this is a religious belief.”
The problem is, I’ve looked and looked through the gospels, and I can’t find one single instance where Jesus mentions homosexuality at all. I do know he had a lot to say about loving your neighbor as yourself, and not judging others lest ye be judged yourself, and something or other about the importance of tolerance and forgiveness, but nothing about OMG teh gay! In fact, the only parts of the bible that condemn gay folks also condemn huge swaths of the “christian” community, for eating pork and shellfish and goddamn cheeseburgers. The same parts of the bible say I should be put to death for working on Sunday. The same parts say that a significant chunk of the Republican, “christian” right in Congress should be stoned (and no, not in the fun way), because of adultery, much of which is also of that icky queer nature. So what is it, Herr Phillips? Because if you’re willing to break out the big bucket of rocks and crosses for that kind of party, we might be able to come to a compromise on gay marriage (the added benefit, of course, is that with the religious right getting their biblically prescribed punishment, there won’t be any around any more to vote against goddamn equality in, you know, freakin’ America, but I digress).
But, as much as I can’t stand douche nozzles like Jack Phillips, he’s not the worst part of this whole thing.
See, the story linked above is about how his business has doubled since the guys he turned away made his discrimination public. As Jackoff Phillips mentioned in an interview, “…we had about twice as much business as normal…There are people coming in to support us.”
Really? God damn it, really?
So let me get this straight: people in Denver found out that this cake shop was discriminating against people based solely on who they wanted to marry, and decided that they would buy cake to help him out? Seriously? What the hell is wrong with you people?
But then, with the recent actions of the Westboro Baptist Church (along with Chick-fil-a), and the State of Louisiana giving millions of taxpayer dollars to teach creationism in christian charter schools (not to mention the very existence of Colorado Springs), should I be surprised that the crazy and stupid and bigoted found a way to spread here, too? I can’t wait for the rapture. Earth will be a lot nicer when we rational people are finally rid of these morons.
As an aside, did anyone mention to Jack Phillips’ supporters that owning a cake shop is only one pirouette or a half teaspoon of glitter away from giving out hand jobs at the Denver Swim Club, anyway? Come on, Jack, just admit it, already.
Turns out that Herr Jackoff Phillips, while refusing to make a cake for gay couples’ ceremonies, seems to have no problem doing so for dogs. I might be just a bleeding heart, squishy liberal, but even I have sense enough to rank people above animals (only because I fall into the people category, mind you, I’d probably feel differently were I another species, but I digress). Way to go, Jack. I’m sure Jesus is real proud.